im not quite sure what was the point in today, it was okay..but a drag. id have rather stayed at home really. infact id rather be at school then at home because i have something to concentrate on there and i dont have to think about anything else there, when at home i get focused on all my flaws and people who arent talking to me. and how shit tonight is going to be and how nobody is going to talk to me. i didnt get upset yesterday even though i thought i would. well i sorta did when i had a big conversation with chris about everything we miss. i feel as if im complaining with losing people when its my fault, and other people who have lost family from no fault of their own. and im complaining. it makes me feel even more selfish.

All the formspring and critisism pisses me off inside. because when everyone else does it its okay but when i do it its all oh my god.
like i look on your tumblr and theres a picture of some overthin model and underneath it says i want to be like this by summer, and then you have a go at me for wanting to lose weight? im sorry but what the fuck!
nobody is talking ot me tonight. as usual. so i will go and eat my cake and stare at my empty wall because really i prefer it without all the fucking painful memories busying up my wall where i see almost every day.
I need to have a shower and tidy my room, but i cant seem to pull myself away from here, i sit infront of here and facebook tumblr and this waiting for a reply or just something. but i dont get anything interesting. so frankly i dont know why i bother